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| | The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available | |
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WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Wed Dec 16, 2009 7:22 pm | |
| This is getting long enough that I've decided it needs a (somewhat) official license statement.
This work is released under Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial 3.0. You are free to copy, distribute and transmit this work, and to adapt the work. You may not publish this work without crediting the author in an acceptable manner, and you may not sell this work or use it for any commercial purpose. Hey, Walrus here. This is one of my first stories, and one of my first posts to Creative Corner. This is by no means a finished product, and I only kinda have an idea for where the plot's going. Criticism, comments ideas for future chapters, genuine admiration etc. would be greatly appreciated I'm a bit of a slow writer, so excuse me if the chapters aren't posted very quickly. BTW, if you know Kuwan from an RP magmak was in, don't call it plagiarism -- magmak didn't just give permission but actually asked me to include the character, we had made a deal and that was my end of the bargain. Don't worry, I'll make him somewhat my own as time goes by. Magmak was pretty loose about what I could do with Kuwan's personality. The plants are wrong in this picture, but the picture of Marloth himself is reasonably correct. Hey, where'd the story go?--> Here it is in standard HTML <-- (don't worry this works even if your browser can't read PDFs. I just posted it in my own personal blog) It got too long to be reasonable, so I put it up on Google docs --> Read it here on Google Docs <--Reformatted with different chapter numbers; posted as PDF, large chunk added -- 6/12/10 10:24 PM EST Chapters 11 and 12 posted -- 5/16/10, 2:51 PM EST Chapters 9 and 10 posted -- 4/20/10, 3:25 PM EST Chapter 8 posted -- 4/20/10, 12:26 PM EST Chapter 7 posted -- 3/28/10, 4:11 PM EST Chapter 6 posted -- 3/9/10, 11:42 PM EST Chapters 3, 4 and 5 posted -- 2/10/10, 6:31 PM EST Chapter 2 posted -- 12/29/09, 7:37 PM EST Chapter 1 posted -- 12/20/09, 4:28 PM EST More will be posted shortly.
Last edited by WalrusGumboot on Thu Jul 01, 2010 1:20 am; edited 28 times in total | |
| | | Paige Legend
Posts : 62 Join date : 2009-12-12 Age : 26 Location : Planet Special. What, you haven't heard of it?
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Thu Dec 17, 2009 4:38 pm | |
| Okay, this is interesting, but elaboration would be nice. Obviously, I realize this is the attention getter (hence "Prologue"), so... keep posting I guess. The vocabulary choice is okay, it could be worse, could be better. Sentence fluency is fine. Basically, not a horrible prologue. Pretty good, actually. | |
| | | magmak Legend
Posts : 10 Join date : 2009-12-11 Location : Being chased by angry breakfast items for killing their god.
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sat Dec 19, 2009 6:53 am | |
| Need I say anything I didn't say at school? Yes, actually. You should have posted the picture, it might have helped. | |
| | | leestriter Legend
Posts : 32 Join date : 2009-12-12
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sat Dec 19, 2009 9:27 am | |
| What I love is how alien and different the character is, the type of thing which, it sounds like, we would run screaming if we saw it (It sounds like its hunting humans!) but yet, it seems so real, and even with so little writing, we can sympathize. | |
| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sat Dec 19, 2009 4:16 pm | |
| - magmak wrote:
- Need I say anything I didn't say at school? Yes, actually. You should have posted the picture, it might have helped.
Yeah, but I plan on describing it later. Still, I should scan/recreate it and post it. Also, the next chapter is close to being done. I'll post it when I'm ready BTW nice avatar. | |
| | | Paige Legend
Posts : 62 Join date : 2009-12-12 Age : 26 Location : Planet Special. What, you haven't heard of it?
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sat Dec 19, 2009 7:35 pm | |
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| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sun Dec 20, 2009 2:29 pm | |
| Chapter 1 posted! Don't worry, we find out what happened to the thing from the prologue later.
Edit: Forgot to mention, I changed the name to The Speed of Light. Edit: Chapter 2 posted! It's a lot better than Chapter 1, trust me. | |
| | | Paige Legend
Posts : 62 Join date : 2009-12-12 Age : 26 Location : Planet Special. What, you haven't heard of it?
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Mon Feb 01, 2010 4:54 pm | |
| Correct, the second chapter was a great deal better than the first. But the change of the POV was kind of weird. Like, chapter one was third person or something and the second chapter was first person.
This story is turning out kind of sci-fi, so let me warn you now that I am not a big futuristic fan. I prefer history novels to science fiction, so don't expect me to be totally with you at some times. I didn't even like The Missing: Found all that much. Still, I will continue reading your story, just don't expect to get a great reply, plot wise. Or idea wise. Anything that has to do with science wise. But I can help grammar/spelling/punctuation wise.
- Quote :
- Suddenly, after sitting for a few minutes thinking about weather I should try to find a way to escape, a holographic image came out of the light at the top of the enclosure.
I think you are talking about "whether" not the actual weather, weather, as in sunny, cloudy, rainy. There's also another spelling error somewhere in chapter 2 (none in chapter 1, that I noticed anyway, in case you were wondering) but I just now noticed that it didn't show up in the previous messages box, so wait while I post it after this one.
Last edited by Paige on Thu Feb 25, 2010 7:13 pm; edited 1 time in total | |
| | | Paige Legend
Posts : 62 Join date : 2009-12-12 Age : 26 Location : Planet Special. What, you haven't heard of it?
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Mon Feb 01, 2010 4:58 pm | |
| Sorry for double posting, but it had to be done.
- Quote :
- Still he continued, now ranting more that telling me anything.
"That" means to be "than", I think. | |
| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Wed Feb 10, 2010 4:23 pm | |
| - Paige wrote:
- Sorry for double posting, but it had to be done.
- Quote :
- Still he continued, now ranting more that telling me anything.
"That" means to be "than", I think. Sorry about that and the weather, autocorrect and being a bad typist can be an annoying combination. Sorry I've been away so long, I had a big term paper due... took up a lot of time. I have a lot more to post though, so here are the next few chapters. | |
| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Thu Feb 11, 2010 2:05 pm | |
| - Paige wrote:
- This story is turning out kind of sci-fi, so let me warn you now that I am not a big futuristic fan. I prefer history novels to science fiction, so don't expect me to be totally with you at some times. I didn't even like The Missing: Found all that much. Still, I will continue reading your story, just don't expect to get a great reply, plot wise. Or idea wise. Anything that has to do with science wise. But I can help grammer/spelling/punctuation wise.
Sorry for double posting, but I just have to say one thing. I too don't like certain sci-fi novels where the characters are flat, the story is about the action. I'm planning on developing my characters fully, so that they're not just some random people from the future doing something, they're real people doing real things, people that you know personality wise. That's probably because I'm basing my characters off of people in my life -- Friends, family, etc. It's understandable why you wouldn't like sci-fi if you're not a science person, because the entire genre has a bad rep, many of the early sci-fi novels had what I refer to as "cardboard" characters, because they're flat and only serve as pawns for the author to reveal some crazy plot twist. P.S. You spelled "grammar" wrong. Sorry, but it was too ironic not to point out. | |
| | | Paige Legend
Posts : 62 Join date : 2009-12-12 Age : 26 Location : Planet Special. What, you haven't heard of it?
| | | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Wed Mar 03, 2010 9:50 pm | |
| - Paige wrote:
- ...you must think I'm such a hypocrite...
Not at all! I just love a good bit of irony now and then | |
| | | magmak Legend
Posts : 10 Join date : 2009-12-11 Location : Being chased by angry breakfast items for killing their god.
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Fri Mar 12, 2010 9:58 am | |
| Sorry for not being on in such a long time. I'm only posting now because I have nothing better to do, and I found a spelling mistake. Near the end of chapter 5, you spelled "team" "teem". That is all. | |
| | | Ldr09
Posts : 6 Join date : 2010-03-16
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Tue Mar 16, 2010 2:20 am | |
| I reallly like the idea of a non-humanoid (not two arms two legs one head) alien. Good character description. Also, nice with the time space warp thing. This will be a really interesting story i hope. Keep up the good work and i'll see you on aviary walrus | |
| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sun Mar 28, 2010 2:19 pm | |
| Chapter 7 posted, and I've been playing with the idea of yet another name change, but I'm not final on it yet. I'm thinking of changing it to A Tale of two Continents because it has more plot relevance, but I can't say why just yet. Edit: Chapter 8 is up now. Soon chapters 9 & 10 will be too. | |
| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Tue Apr 20, 2010 1:28 pm | |
| Chapters 9 and 10 were just posted. Feedback plz! | |
| | | magmak Legend
Posts : 10 Join date : 2009-12-11 Location : Being chased by angry breakfast items for killing their god.
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Sat Jun 26, 2010 8:12 am | |
| I have a touch of trouble. I click "read here" and it takes me to a google page saying that my browser does not support internet documents or something to that effect. That, coupled with the fact that I do not, and probably can not, have a G-Mail account, has made me very depressed. *Sigh* | |
| | | WalrusGumboot Legend
Posts : 59 Join date : 2009-12-16 Age : 27 Location : Hiding under your bed
| Subject: Re: The Speed of Light - Ch. 6 up - HTML and PDF available Wed Jun 30, 2010 5:13 pm | |
| - magmak wrote:
- I have a touch of trouble. I click "read here" and it takes me to a google page saying that my browser does not support internet documents or something to that effect. That, coupled with the fact that I do not, and probably can not, have a G-Mail account, has made me very depressed. *Sigh*
I'll see if I can make it so you can see it... uhh... I guess I'll just put it back on the forum. It's pretty dang long though, and I don't have a way to host *actual* pdfs instead of Google's random clones... I'll put it in in plain HTML soon. Edit -- You better appreciate it, I spent two hours putting it into HTML manually because my copy of OpenOffice has the Java Runtime Environment improperly installed and won't let me install it correctly. (No I don't know what that means) Whatever. Anything for a friend I suppose. </grumble> | |
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